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location:: Home - Avalon, Boston victory-hour:: yes⚡️ pomodoro-blocks:: 7 wake-up:: 5:20 AM day:: Friday icon:: 📅⚡️🌟🌟 sort-key:: 2022.09.30 - My Daily Mantra: Shant man. Shant Svabhav. - **06:11 AM, day. Morning Pages** collapsed:: true - Pre-Meditation Mind - occupied and talkative like last night with cogito gang - **Can you go against the voices?** - I don't know. Wait. Did I not flow with the voices last night? Wasn't that the jujutsu? #selfinquiry on Meeting the Cogito Gang after 3 years. - I did. I got framed into a personality. Like water. - Like a little annoyance because it was a the group. I couldn't connect or open to anybody individually. Meeting everyone after so long in a group was the problem. I was meeting their terms. - ==Lesson: Remember group has an identity, it's own conflicts and emotions.== #lessons id:: 6395d2d9-63a7-424e-b950-2f6c74138c5e - Ok. So why is that bad? - I guess neither bad nor good. I just didn't like what manifested through me. So I would not be meeting cogito peeps in such group setting again. I will avoid it. That's it. - A stanza from @Carl Rogers in Books/A Way of Being that captures this exact feeling. - I am disappointed when I realize—and of course this realization always comes afterward, after a lag of time—that I have been too frightened or too threatened to let myself get close to what I am experiencing, and that consequently I have not been genuine or congruent. … it is inevitable that there is a considerable amount of one-upmanship, of showing off one’s knowledge and achievements. It seems important for each Fellow to impress the others, to be a little more assured, to be a little more knowledgeable than he really is. I found myself doing this same thing—playing a role of having greater certainty and greater competence than I really possess. I can’t tell you how disgusted with myself I felt as I realized what I was doing: I was not being me, I was playing a part. - **They open the door without knocking and just walk in right now. Does that scare you?** - No. But I feel reactive. - **What comes top of my mind?** - To be congruent with my real feelings. Listen to them. Don't let thoughts and actions take over you. - **What is smallest thing I can do for settling the top of mind thing?** Feel this every moment. - **What is the smallest thing I can do to be more in line with who I am?** Feel the moment. Be congruent #Congruence - **What first word pops into my mind when I think about today?** - Friday. Social day. Meeting Ayaz. Call with Bipin. Then date night with boo baby. - **What's one good thing about Saie?** - She is a person with strong authentic values. She is grounded in her values. - **What is smallest thing I can do make Saie happy today?** - Press my love onto her - **What is one thing I like about myself today?** - I always come back home - **If I were guaranteed not to fail, what would I be doing differently?** - Not react. - **Exercise Small Thoughts** - Anytime I see myself "doing" - at work, talking to saie, in the house - i bring myself to the silence. - ⚡️🙆 🧘 📓 ☯️ 📖 5 - 7 AM: practice/victoryroutine🌞 #log🪵/victoryHour💪 🍅🍅 - 🙆 25 mins Morning Yoga #playlist/5AM - 🧘 20 mins Morning Meditation - 📓 50 mins Morning Page & Day Plan 🍅🍅 - ☯️ 5 mins Morning Tai Chi - ☕️👧7 AM: coffee with boo - 🛏️ 📖 8 AM: 25 mins #practice/Reading📖 🍅 collapsed:: true - Books/Stillness Speaks - Books/A Way of Being - Block Reference - 🛏️ 😴 8:30 AM: #powernap20😴 - 🌟 🖥 9:20 - 11:30 AM: P/Algorithms 🍅 🍅🍅🍅. Day 43. I persevered. I feel confident on the other side. collapsed:: true - Algo/Cycle in Graph #revisit - Not feeling this one. Will come back to this. Wanna keep the good vibes. And This ain't it. - Algo/Minimum Passes of Matrix ✅ - Wow. Read the problem statement. Feels like solving for a game! An entire game in one function. It's like solving chess via code. Damn man. Maybe solving chess ain't that hard once we can represent the board in 2d matrix and manipulate the moves. #projectidea P/Chess Game - 15: got the algo, whichis brute force; just wanna code it up for now - Struggled 15 mins on debugging how to clone an array. Because 'in' cannot be a variable name. It's a fucking reserved keyword! Thanks use errors. #mofo😡 #javascript - OMG. Another #javascript lesson. simply `[...matrix]` does not mean values are copied even when they are scalar numbers. It's a shallow copy! Yuck. Both my curr and next matrix were pointing to same number values. Which I guess is all an object in javascript. Noobie programming mistakes. Spend 30 mins debugging this shit. - This is the right way to *copy* `let mnext = matrix.map(row => row.slice(0));` - Algo/Task Assignment ✅ - 10 mins: I think I have the algo. Sort tasks descending. Pull highest and lowest tasks hmm. - Wait. but I need to sort without losing original index values. Totally stuck on how to do that. Which seems like a general algorithm in itself. Interesting. Can't use hashmap as values can be dup. - Ah.. looked at solution. I could use hashmap with array for values. Damn! I just lacked the confidence to think in this direction. But yeah I had this algo in mind. I can code it up. - 40 mins: coding done. debugged. got it. I feel confident on control. The struggle really is with coding things up quickly. Hmm.. - Also lesson: making #Typescript compiler happy at times with ! `const task1Idx = tasksIdx[task1Val].pop()!` - ==I am coming appreciate algorithms more and more as an interview question.== - ==I am finding the hours put in. The hard work. That's where my confidence stems form== #radio/thepot - 🖥 💼 11:30 - 12:15 PM: #workworkwork 45 mins. Because I wanted to. That's a wrap. #wlb. - 🚶 🥣 🛠 12:15 - 2 PM: Break Fast. Meeting @Ayaz Cogito P/Boston Strong 2022 - 🖥 💼 2 - 3 PM: #workworkwork - could have made this 15 mins but.. I had to impress Tolga. - 🖥 ☎️ 3 - 6:20 PM: P/Digital India call with @bipin singh. Long call. - Damn. Like having heavy desi food. I did it too much. We have a pivot - Block Reference - 👧 🍽 🍷😴 ☕️7 - 11 PM: log🪵/Date Night - Wine and thai food to kick off the night at home. Then we both pass out only to wake up fresh and ready for nice cup of coffee at 11 PM. 😂 - 🌟 Every Day Kaizen ✅ collapsed:: true - P/Accent Reduction With Gabe ✅ - It's a good things that this has been the good practice - A/Tai Chi practice for the day + bonus to do 10 mins on new moves ✅ - ❌ Daily 5 - wrap up external events with Ayaz and Bipin without exhaustion. Be real. Be yourself. ✅ - way too long engagements. go social was ok. not too far. - Next Action: collapsed:: true - {{query (and (page-property type "project") (page-property status "active")) }} query-properties:: [:icon :page :next-action] - **02:59 AM Lights Off** - caffeinated; late night friday. kindle. boo. love it - Stories - {{twitter https://twitter.com/emollick/status/1575891622730006528?s=12&t=VTIExFKVpLemwnh6oH_zkQ}} -