Sunday, June 25, 2023

Error converting content: marked is not a function

location:: Home - Avalon, Boston 
victory-hour:: no😴
pomodoro-blocks:: 3
wake-up:: 11 AM
day:: Sunday
icon:: πŸ—“
  - **3:06 PM, day. Morning Pages**
- Remember: Be an Adult
- Hello. Good chill Sunday.
- Self Inquiry into family conversation uncovering my own Ignorance
	  collapsed:: true
  - Speaking on call with #family or #saiefamily still finds me with my energies going haywire. I get fatigued. Maybe it's the unknown. Lack of control. Mistached expectations. Or what not. It's just not a pleasant experience. I keep asking myself - How can I be myself?. I try. But I seem to miss that mark or it is then just what it is. An awkward conversation. Why? Diary
  - With my family, I can sense that Saie is not in her element. She is formal. Good but formal. Ok. That should raise no alarm.
  - hm, then why do I have this stance against formality?
  - I sense lack of connections. But does it have to be deep connection?
  - It doesn't. Not on a phone call. What if I accept the formality?
  - Hmm that should work. You see my parents are semi formal too. I assume them to be same as they are with me. Hmm. #meaculpa
  - Embrace this formality. Remember facts. Yess. Re-reading I was befuddled. Then I discover fact based logic enlightened the space. Hmm.
  - Is it my own Incompetence that expects the world to be Understanding? #hmm
  - Maybe. Maybe it's the ==baby me wanting a mother that just KNOWS==. Yes. #boom
  - Block Reference
  - All is well. But at these times ==Sid can be an Adult. Embrace the Facts.==
  - Laying down the facts manifests authority
- Yesterday, with @Logan Roy imbibing inside of me, I could sense my #goofiness more clearly as Saie and I roamed around Newbury St. I caught myself a few times - my giggling, smiling and being "nice". In moments of my #draper self, I could gaze the room, catch the eyes, but I could sense my the goofiness and my weakness is percevied by others. It's a #habit - being docile. This is all to Be Dangerous
  - Why? Because no one would trust a weak ling.
  - People have sensed the fear. They will trust the one who can be more dangerous than their own fear. #thisisdeep
- Let's then Stay on the backfoot. Let's practice being #practice/hyperaware
- 🧘 πŸ““ πŸ’ͺ πŸ™† 5 - 7 AM: practice/victoryroutine🌞
- πŸ““ 50 mins Morning Page & Day Plan πŸ…πŸ…
	  id:: 2c3f72cb-0be4-417d-b521-85848026b855
- πŸ’ͺ 20 mins P/One Rep Max
  - Deadlift today. 180 lbs. Can go +10 next round
- πŸ™† 5 mins #practice/yogaπŸ™†
- 🧘 5 mins #mooji/5min-immensityofbeing
- #practice/ReadingπŸ“– Books/Relentless πŸ…
	-