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- Everyone I meet disappoints me Including this text edit I’ll self reflect, look at fingers pointing back at me, who have I become? Better That’s what comes front of mouth Different on second attempt I’m playing a different game People are worse in here Always seeking advantage But then why are people on the outside disappointing? Hmm Maybe because I don’t know what they want Hmm Because I assume they must seek an advantage? Hmm Interesting. But I’m pissed Angry at the engagement with my childhood friend For he behaved and tried to contain me Hmm. Instead of my expectation to contain I expect him to be lower Below At reverence Hmm But when I see them outplay Speak behind my back To frame me into a box To act above me I am deeply offended Aren’t we both then playing the same game? Let’s say we are But then only one can win Hmm Why does my friendship with Ercan work? We have a common mission And he lets me drive Hmm And we are successful. He play his role with style. He enjoys it. I am ecstatic Maybe I have changed? Maybe friends have as well? Maybe there are part of me they remind me, maybe there are parts that just don’t register Anil -“Maine bola taj chalte hajn majn pay kar doonga” Anil & Rai taking - “bas poorani story bata rahein hani, main siddhu ko bolta hu saie se baat kara, toh aaj kara raha hai” Rais wife - no greeting, I said hello to his son In the morning, group was together, I called my own birthday Mudit wished Ravi’s wife - “happy birthday bhaiya, obtuse disconnect” No real connection Himanshu wished on chat. No call ☎️ 🚩 I’m 38, under alcohol so won’t finalize any plans But I put this in for consideration - never to call or make inbound attempt for any communication with this gang; then time will tell - I stay real; I stay real; the executive sid, and other Sid or side will only allow others to disappoint me hmm. Do it to save them - Do it to save them. No giggling. No adjustment. Just tough love. Always on. Tough love. Always on. Tough love - Look good doing it all. Workout 🏋️ and stay a star 🌟 12:30 AM - Himanshu called Better convo than rest of lko gang; guess US makes for common topics and understanding Also has a curious business mind which helps relate with Interesting Still a desi Gawar Won’t bring him home But I can better speak to him about collaborating on a project than to rest of the gang Gawar hain yeh log Outside of family setting, do they know how to meet us? Hmm The tricks that Anil played I call him immediately after she leaves office I hang up just at 4pm before she comes back home Omg. This was worse than khosla 😡 I feel the urge back to square this one out with him But gawar hain yeh Hmm. Feels like white people letting ghetto be ghetto But I didn’t keep slaves I am not responsible for anyone’s state of being No shame, no guilt Just disappointment For I want to be friends But I cannot lower my status Hmmm I cannot lower my status into gutter “Keep people at arms length” Hmm Yes This is it. This resonates. This solves. This insulates.