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title:: Books/Rules of the Game purchased:: Nov 25th, 2013 start:: Jun 11th, 2022 end:: published:: length:: author:: cover:: - Cover Notes - Bought this book way back during #puadays in 2013. Picked it up to read as part of #P/Rules of the Game - Realization collapsed:: true - On [[Limiting Beliefs and Status]] id:: 62a4bf54-0940-4de1-b1fc-67b58275dc15 - Ideas collapsed:: true - Opening collapsed:: true - It’s nonthreatening and makes no one uncomfortable. - It stirs up curiosity and captures the person’s or group’s imagination. - It’s a springboard for follow-up conversation. - It serves as a vehicle for you to display your personality. - It should appear spontaneous, be motivated by curiosity, and be interesting to most people. - Don’t begin the opener by saying “I’m sorry,” “Excuse me,” or “Pardon me, but.” Where men are initially attracted to beauty, most women are initially attracted to status. And a man of high status never apologizes for his presence. - The opener is used only to break the ice and get the group’s attention. It contains no magic formula that will make a woman swoon at your feet. It’s just a way to keep your mouth moving while you display your charming personality. - **Key:** add both a root and a time constraint to each approach. - **Mental Model:** One of the strategies of the game is anticipating and defusing these objections—and any objections—before they happen. If you do this successfully in the first minute or two of your approach, you’ll be much less likely to receive negative or flat responses. - **The Game:** The next key stage of the interaction is known as ==the “hook point.”== This is when, instead of being a stranger taking up her time, you’ve captivated her—and suddenly she doesn’t want you to leave. So, reluctantly, you allow her to take up a little more of your precious time. - Disqualification collapsed:: true - ==Tone is everything.== Most disqualifiers should also be delivered casually and offhand, as if you’re not seeking or expecting a reaction. - ==The point of the disqualifier is to raise your status to her level or above.== - the goal of disqualification is to meet women and tell them you don’t want to date them. - In every interaction, be the person giving validation, not the one needing it. - To disqualify a woman, demonstrate early in an interaction that you’re not interested in her. - By waiting before showing interest, you give her an opportunity to win you over with her charm, personality, and intelligence. - ==There’s a fine line between flirting and hurting.== - And disqualification is never intended to be mean or insulting. So say these with a smile on your face and laughter in your voice, as if you were good-naturedly picking on a younger sibling. - On the simplest level, you can ask what her favorite films are and then act as if her answer is a deal breaker. “You actually liked that? That’s it. I’m going home. Nice meeting you.” #ihateleos - **Mental Model:** Screening, Push-Pull - Taking control of an interaction by alternating back and forth between these two poles—punishment and reward, validation and invalidation, approval and disapproval, qualification and disqualification, push and pull—is one of the key ways to amplify attraction. - 10 More Ways to Disqualify collapsed:: true - Save her from you. - Give yourself a monetary value. - Put her in the friend zone. - (by telling her she’s like the little sister you never had), - Go over the top. - Reverse roles. collapsed:: true - Everything she doesn’t want a guy to do, jokingly accuse her of doing to you. Tell her to give her obvious pickup lines a rest, to stop treating you like a mindless piece of meat, to quit trying to get you drunk - - Employ her. - Be the snob. - Be the authority figure. - Playfully tell her she’s starting to get on your nerves, she’s in big trouble, or she’s just earned herself detention. - Make her compete. - Challenge her: - Any line a guy might use to hit on her, you should say the opposite. And anything she might say to a guy who’s hitting on her, you can say to her instead. - Day 2 collapsed:: true - **What three accomplishments would you like to achieve to make you happier?** 1. Being independent of an employer. Having a cash flow positive business which self sustains and thus gives me time to think, ponder, innovate, and further make the economic system grow. 2. Having boo be happy and content. 3. Be myself. I knock the person out cold. Disengage from the mind. Life unfolds with it’s highest potential. There are many means to it that could have goals but the end is complete dissolution of ego. - - **What are the reasons these accomplishments will make you happier?** In a way, there are no goals or accomplishment that bring happiness. An accomplishment spring out a new one. But what will allow happiness to manifest is having this system that helps me not be distracted to change other goals. A system for #Isness. - **What is your personal mission?** **I will become** (maximum four words): nobody **who will** (maximum four words): just watch life unfold **within days/weeks/years:** NOW! #deepbreath - **List three specific results that will let you know that you’ve accomplished your mission.** 1. I will have journal entries with no regrets - small or big, at work or in personal life. 2. I will have no physical action based on anger or fear 3. I will have disidentified with the person and will not have ego and conditioned mind manifest personality or run my life. - **Why are you now fully committed to pursuing your personal mission?** Because if I don’t pursue it now, I will continue to suffer over the next years and 1. my happiness will decrease 2. my joy will get worse 3. my peace will fail. But if I do pursue it now, I will enjoy the next years and 1. my grounding will increase 2. my #selfabidance will improve 3. ==my manifestation will be dancing 🕺== - Day 1 collapsed:: true - Write one or two sentences describing how you believe other people currently perceive you. - In US, good looking avg or above average lad. Immature body language Accent. Guy from India. - In india, good looking chaava rich and highly attractive like arrogance on the face; not the warmest person. - Write one or two sentences describing how you’d like to be perceived by others. - attractive; something magnetic about him that pulls me. confident and warm. Grounded and handsome. Wanna marry him. Can feel his love. I want his embrace. Makes me feel safe. - Three of your behaviors or characteristics I would like to change. id:: 62a47d73-4930-47f7-b3db-abbf84be4b89 - Don't make big deal of things on your mind - Don’t physically react when triggered - Shun the arrogance - Three new behaviors or characteristics you would like to adopt. id:: 62a47d7b-b7f4-47b5-abd3-115513931152 - Be non threatening - Show vulnerability or dont hide it - Love embrace all, all the time - Mission collapsed:: true - Block Reference - Progsum - Limiting Beliefs collapsed:: true - LIMITING BELIEF: If I talk to her, she’ll ignore me—or, even worse, say something mean that will embarrass me. - LIMITING BELIEF: People are looking at me, judging me, or making fun of me. - Block Reference - LIMITING BELIEF: I’m not good-looking, rich, or famous enough to be with a beautiful woman. - Like talent scouts, many women are attracted to men with goals and potential. - LIMITING BELIEF: Some guys are born with the ability to charm women. Other guys just don’t have it and never will. - Fortunately, there is a third type of guy: one who can learn - LIMITING BELIEF: All I have to do is “be myself,” and eventually I’ll meet the right woman who likes me for me. - This works only if you know exactly who you are, what your strengths are, and how to convey them successfully. - LIMITING BELIEF: To figure out what women want, just ask them. - ==**LIMITING BELIEF: If I approach a woman, she’ll know I’m hitting on her and think I’m lame.**== - This is only partially true—women think this only when men approach them badly. - Few women will resent meeting someone who is warm, funny, sincere, interesting, engaging, makes them feel comfortable, and isn’t going to stick around talking their ear off. - LIMITING BELIEF: Women don’t like sex as much as men do. They’re mostly interested in having a relationship. - Voice Training collapsed:: true - Breath and Posture id:: 62cb8fc2-fabe-4dc9-8ef8-b5eb190d6c96 - There are two factors that make all the difference between a good orator and a bad one: breath and posture. - ==Breathing deeply before you speak fills your lungs with air, allowing you to give full power to your words.== #gamechanger - (for posture): imagining a string running from the bottom of your spine to the top of your head and then pulling it taut. - Highlights - The objective: Get a date in thirty days or less. - A limiting belief is something that you believe about yourself, other people, or the world—and although it isn’t actually true, the fact that you think it is holds you back from experience and success. Any time you tell yourself you “can’t” do something that’s within the realm of human possibility—that’s a limiting belief. id:: 62a42c47-789f-4f12-a225-35fd2c6866bc - The comedian Chris Rock knows why. He has a routine in which he explains that anything a man says to a woman translates as “How about some dick?” - The art of the approach is the art of spontaneity. If you wait too long, either she’ll notice you scoping her out and get creeped out—or, more likely, you’ll think about it for too long, get nervous, and talk yourself out of approaching. - If you lose just one person, you risk losing the whole group. - the rule of trying: Don’t. If you try hard, you die hard. #It’s No Big Deal - Throughout your interactions with most women, whether they’re consciously aware of it or not, they’re putting you on the spot to see how you’ll react. - Most of the guidelines of the game are based on perceived relative status, and they change **depending on how she feels your status compares to hers** at any given time. -